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The Magnificent One (Corky Dan)

Corky Dan

The Magnificent One is a current Superuniverse Top 10 character created and portrayed by Howard Baum, which is based off of the exaggerated "strenuous exercises and eating combinations" and overall laid back nature of real life wrestler Don Muraco .

Origin

The origin of the character can be traced back to Episode 79, where Howard starts riffing with TGBL about the laid-back and gruff nature of the "Prince of Darkness" Don Muraco's promo styles, proclaiming that "the time for talkin' is ovah" and how "it's all...comin'...down."

Character

First "officially" introduced in Episode 80, The Magnificent One would proclaim that, once again, it's "all...comin'...down" and that the time for talkin', is indeed, "ovah." Magnificent One would list off his accolades of strenuous exercise and eating combinations, which include such events as being the first man to eat a tray of Chicken Tetrazzini while simultaneously performing the Harvard Step Test, eating a BLT while impregnating Ann-Margaret, eating a tray of lasagna while riding the biggest wave on the north shore, eating caviar while detailing his car, and eating a banana split while performing the first-ever Siamese Twin separation.

The Magnificent One is also the head of the "Ernie Roth Memorial Clinic for Oral Hygiene for the Indigent", which requires donations of old bridgework, gold teeth, bronze teeth, bridges, partials, and old dentures. It was originally located at 22 Aucahuko Lane, but eventually moved to __ Eeichiheeikie Terrace. - the correct spelling of each location being a mystery, due to the strange and mysterious spelling and pronounciation of the spelling of the island of Hawaii.

In Episode 82, The Magnificent One would also detail his story - in solidarity of the #metoo movement in Hollywood - of the tribulations he faced within the wrestling industry due to the "Midget Mafia" of female Midget wrestlers as the main players of power behind the scenes.

In Episode 84, The Magnificent One - proclaiming his spot as #2 (and the lethargic nature of being second best) - would later bring his "crew" down from Sunset Beach, Hawaii, which would include such ragtag characters as:

Lactose Intolerant Bobby Jaggers

Fetal Alcohol Syndrome David Crockett (or as we may know him, David Crockett)

Hiccupping Fabulous Moolah

Flamboyant Mike George

Preemie Stan Stasiak

Mild-to-Moderate Psoriasis Pampero Firpo

Micropenis Ox Baker

Tranny Haystacks Calhoun

Easily Startled Lex Luger

Speaker of the House Rufus R. Jones

Big Nipple Stan Hansen

Peggy Lee Pleather

Unhappy Humphrey

Mentally Stable Luke Graham

Ectopic Pregnancy King Curtis

and Don Ho : Male Prostitute

Facts / Miscellaneous

First appearance in the Top 10: Episode 80 (#9)

Total appearances: 3 (Episode 80, 82, 84)